Kapp'n's Song
"Kapp'n's Sea Shanty" is a song performed by Kapp'n in Animal Crossing and Animal Crossing: New Leaf during boat rides to and from Animal Island and Tortimer Island, respectively. During these songs, Kapp'n sings about his life and family.
In New Leaf, the song can be skipped if the A button or touch screen are pressed repeatedly. Additionally, during multiplayer, the player can tell Kapp'n (or Leilani if they are heading home) that they do not want him to sing.
Additionally, Kapp'n's Sea Shanty from New Leaf is featured as a song in Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 3DS / Wii U and Super Smash Bros. Ultimate as Kapp'n's Song.
Lyrics
In Animal Crossing
One stanza songs
While I do love me cukes
they sure curl me flukes
But now please! Zucchinis
give me the spooks...
...Zucchini spooks
I'll sing me a fair rhyme
to pass away time
Watch me words, like seabirds
through the sky climb
Upward they climb...
I feel such low down shame
me lovely dear dame...
I'm a rat- I laughed at
yer mum's weird name
What a weird name...
Me soul, onward it sails
me belly, it ails
I'm so glum, 'cause me tum
feels full of snails
So full of snails...
Me heart feels savage pangs
from love's wicked fangs
I think oft of the soft
song that she sang
That song she sang...
A lone pebble slip-slides
beneath the cold tides.
It's movement is a hint
where love's truth hides.
There love's truth hides...
Hey there me old mum
Yer boy, he feels glum.
Without my lullaby,
Sleep just won't come.
It just won't come
Two stanza songs
Ye can't go wrong
With my Cucumber song
Cucumber, Cucumber
So green and long
They're so good cooked or raw
Or with some coleslaw
Go get me two or three
That I can gnaw
Here, take good note:
What moves old Kapp'n's boat
Be an iced, extra-nice
Cucumber Float
Fetch one for me young lad;
You won't be left sad!
Don't be slow or you'll know
I might get mad!
Hey now, me boys
With yer trinkets and toys
Yar, I know Nintendo
Gives me yer joys
But I ask this of ye:
Can games sing like me
Mario can't croon, bro
Don't you agree?
Ye think yer bad
Some kind o' wreslin' lad
Ye've got guts but yer nuts
Don't make me mad
With my turtle-tough shell
I'll ring yer bell
Black yer eye, make ye cry
And say farewell
Oh, listen ye to
mine salty shanty
about the sweet lady
who once loved me
She looked fair and fine with
her eyes upon mine
Oh! Until she got ill:
seasick from brine
A wrestlin' dog
A mean ol' tusslin' frog
An unsound, big muscle-bound
Big boxin' hog
They're just silly old clowns
I'll take them all down
For I be the best sea
Turtle around
Life on the sea suits
A pirate like me.
A footpad like you, lad,
Ain't so lucky.
But on briny sea swells,
Me heart, it beats well.
Through sea air, I'll float
Where me soul compels
In New Leaf
Return trip
First verse
Female:
I said good-bye to me free wheeling past
and hello to me girl, me wee little lass.
When she was very small, well, she was so cute.
She favors her mother. She's a real beaut!
When I met me wife, she weren't very impressed.
I guess she didn't like the way that I dressed!
Sailor's hat along with them big ol' bell-bottoms
guess ya shouldn't wear some clothes just 'cause ya got 'em!
'Member yer manners. Ye say "please" and "thank ye."
If ye don't, Mum will cry into her hankie!
Mum spent so many years raisin' you right.
So get yer manners down, and she'll sleep at night!
I baked a big cake for me daughter's birthday.
But she took one taste, and she ran away!
It's like I told me wife: it can't be all my fault
some genius made sugar look 'zactly like salt!
I went ta see me doc. He's kind of a stern bloke.
I said, "Doc, ye gotta help! Me butt be broke!"
Doc did not smile one bit, not even a little,
not when I said, "There's a crack down-a middle!"
Me mum thinks that makeup be kinda like armor.
Thinks wearin' tons means that no one can harmher!
She cakes it on thick in five or six layers.
Looks like facepaint on them football players!
When I needs energy, I drinks cold, dark joe,
an' lo an' behold, right away, it gets me goin'.
Gets me heart pumpin' fast and makes me dizzy.
But then I got no excuse to not be busy!
Me grandma lives in the house where I grew up.
She used to read to me when I was a pup.
She did voices. She made 'em real funny!
She made reading lots of fun, made each day sunny!
Sea monsters be misunderstood, and it's sad.
Known me some sea monsters, and they ain't so bad!
Sure, they may seem real fierce, all tentacles and teeth.
Most of 'em got soft hearts. They be real sweet!
Wish I could shrink a boat down and go sailin',
go sailin' in me ol' washin' machine.
Survivin' spin cycle with all them tube socks
would make me the best sailor the world's ever seen!
Male:
I love me li'l girl, she's me pride an' joy.
Can ye guess her first word? It was "ahoy!"
She's grown to love the sea. Oh, she is just like me!
Ties the knots at the docks, makes me so happy!
Ev'ry guy dreams 'bout girls fightin' o'er him.
But if ye think about it, chances are slim.
Girls stick together. They don't likes ta fight.
Not a good dream, ye guys. Really not bright.
I asked fer me wife's hand at sea. (She said yes.)
Since then not a day goes by I don't feel blessed.
Said, "I needs ta raise me ol' crew number."
Told her she was me li'l cucumber.
Hair in a rainstorm, it looks mighty sweet.
Hair in a windstorm isn't so neat.
Rain-slick wet hair is so cool, it just can't be beat.
Messy windblown hair, that's not such a treat.
I showed up fer tryouts in me best sports gear.
Played like I was in a trance I showed no fear!
But when I opened me eyes, I was so surprised!
I'd made the girls' team, and there weren't any guys!
I can't eat cucumbers without me good mayo.
There's no point without it. Just no way-oh!
Me mum's top-secret recipe, oh, it's the best!
We should start a mayo biz, and you should invest!
Sunlight and moonlight can be rough on the eyes,
but I'll still take 'em o'er yer cloudy skies.
Cloudy skies mean storms, and storms cancel dinner.
I guess ye could say that storms make ye thinner!
Me wife wears perfume. She smells just like roses.
The way to men's hearts is through their noses.
It's not through their tummies, just 'cause some folks say.
A sweet-smelling aroma, I know that's the way!
Used to sail all year long. Can't do that no more.
Me single days be done. I've put to shore.
When yer a fam'ly man, yer fam'ly must come first.
Still get to boat at work. I could do worse!
Don't have much hair to comb, nothing to style.
If I had one lock, it'd be wild!
I'd tease it so high, you would not see the end.
I'd want to let kids climb it, but it might bend!
Neutral:
Thar be some things that ev'ry dad should just know,
things that make yer girl yer pal, yer boy yer bro.
I'm talkin' 'bout stuff like the pull-me-finger trick,
stuff that helps 'em not grow up too quick.
Now that I'm a dad, I thinks about dad things.
I wonder if me girl likes when I sings.
She always chuckles, and then she rolls her eyes.
I guess that's good. Don't want her to date singer guys.
When business be slow, I toss soap in the water,
takes an ice-cold bath right there (wish it were hotter!)
Sudsy! Scrubsy! Loofah! Then shampoo squirts!
Me wife's plan to clean 'er man—even if it hurts!
It goes "Red sky at night, sailors take delight."
'Tis a verse most old salts hold ta be true.
But me, I be diff'rent. I gots me own truth.
When it comes ta sky hue, I prefers it blue!
A captain's only as good as his crew.
With a crew like mine there's so much we can do!
Me mum runs the galley. Me wife be me first mate.
Me girl be the admiral, makes me ship great!
Once got lost out at sea, could not find me way in.
Kapp'n, he were scared! Kapp'n, unprepared! Future looked grim!
Me daughter saved the day, brushed her teeth so clean.
She stood ashore! She smiled so big! Followed me the gleam!
When I were a hatchling and things didn't go well,
I could hide there inside, inside me shell.
Now I be grow'd up. Me shell's kinda smallish.
Don't fit me, and it be needin' a polish.
Sail with me! We'll have the time o' our lives!
It be true! Me and you! Start the high fives!
We'll go far! Ain't no car can outdo us this time!
Ev'ryone knows, ship like this goes well past this rhyme!
Kapp'n be like a barber ye tells yer woes to.
Good listener like that, ev'ryone goes to!
I may not cut yer hair, but I'll hear ye out
—soon as I be done singin', ye wee sea trout!
Saw me a kraken fightin' a big sea snake.
(Might have just been some seaweed couldn't see well.)
I knows what ye be thinkin': "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."
But I swear it be true! (Far as I can tell.)
Second verse
Female:
When I'm away from me sweet little baby girl,
I see her sweet face. She's a real pearl.
She's a real pearl.
When the sun sets on the last day o' summer,
I feel blue, so so blue. It's a bummer.
It's a real bummer!
When me motor's purrin' it don't likes ta quit.
Sometimes ta turn it off, I sneaks up on it.
I sneaks up on it.
If ye make supper once, the chore's yers forever!
Least, that's what me wife tells me. She's so very clever.
She's so very clever.
There's no point actin' tough, no point actin' bold.
Standing shirtless in the rain just gives yea cold.
Just gives ye a cold!
When yer in love, sometimes ya miss some simple cues.
When I first took me wife out, I forgot shoes!
I forgot shoes!
Don't dream of eatin' stuff yer really 'lergic to,
'cause ye might get a rash. Then ye'd be blue.
(Or another hue.)
I may be a turtle, but me shell's not me house.
Can't live in yer back with a child and spouse,
a child and spouse.
Sad songs can make ye cry, but ye should do this:
try laughin' at sad songs, the key ta bliss,
the key ta bliss!
It's just like me grandturtle said, "If ya can't sing good,
sing loud, 'cause then ya won't be misunderstood,
so misunderstood."
Male:
Wouldn't it be so cool if we could throw stress out?
Throw it out with the trash! That'd be cool, no doubt.
That'd be cool, no doubt.
It's nice that folks care 'bout this big ol' sea.
But sea captains need love too. So what about me?
So what about me?
I seen so many sunrises and sunsets.
I enjoy 'em no matter how busy life gets.
How busy life gets!
Don't matter much if ya don't got hair to comb.
The thing that matters most is what's under your dome.
What's under your dome?
If we hit a big rock, I'll be just fine
'cause I got a life raft in this shell o' mine,
in this shell o'mine!
All day long it's "Ahoy, ahoy, ahoy!"
If I weren't doin' this, I'd be a cowboy.
I'd be a cowboy!
Ya should never get upset even if yer dumped.
Kapp'n's always here fer ya. That should keep ya pumped.
That should keep ya pumped!
Cucumbers taste so great, make ya feel sassy.
Here's a little known fact, though: they makes ya gassy.
They makes ya gassy!
I gots ta be careful what I sings about now.
As a dad there's some stuff I can't allow,
I can't allow.
Catch the rest o' yer dream fallin' back asleep.
I love when that happens. It be so deep!
It be so deep!
Neutral:
I giggles when I lectures me girl, it's true.
But her cute little face would make you giggle, too,
make you giggle, too!
Mizzenmast! Scallywags! Poop deck and keelhaul!
Those be some nautical terms fer ye all!
Fer ye all!
Weird's the norm in school, but nothin' brings more doom
than a guy stumblin' into the girls' locker room.
The girls' locker room!
If yer speech be too raw, yer girl's face will flush.
Nothin' sets me straight like me wife's blush,
like me wife's blush.
I sleeps much better when me fam'ly's all home.
Havin' 'em near gives me peace in me big dome,
in me big dome.
Summer's fer swimmin'. The water ain't too cold.
But taking dips in winter? I ain't that bold!
I ain't that bold!
Sometimes men do blubber. Take it from me—I know!
How I cried just last night. (Sad TV show!
Sad TV show!)
Funny how the sun rises no matter what.
What if a director shouted "Cut!"
Shouted "Cut!"
Circle wipe, circle wipe, wonder where ye are.
Ye can't be far away. Yer comin' up! Yar!
Yer comin' up! Yar!
This be the first song I learned. I know it's odd.
First song's 'bout a first song? Hey! Look at that cod!
Hey! Look at that cod!
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